Hot Wheels Shark Park

Not as advertised!

I first saw the Hot Wheels Shark Park play set on a cool little YouTube channel called Racegrooves, A big collector in all kinds of miniature cars and kits. My daughter loved the playset with a shark attacking small cars and she quickly learned all of the sharks 18 phrases and sounds it would make when it caught a car or let it go.

Whilst walking through Toys R Us my daughter suddenly went crazy when she saw the play set in the Hot Wheels section. Only £24.99, it comes with its own car and there's not a spot of pink anywhere to be seen. 

All seemed perfect until we had set everything up and switch the set on. Silence. No shark voice trying to intimidate the would be dare devil car driver, nothing. After running the car through the track and getting nothing but chomping noises and the odd burp from the shark I realised the problem. Europe.

Rather than releasing a different version for each language in Europe Mattel decided instead to just remove all voices from the set. Try explaining that to a very disappointed 3 year old. I found out that this set was released as a UK set complete with all 18 phrases and it can still be purchased for an extortionate amount. As imagination is free, compared to the 3 times I would have to pay for a full set, my daughters shark can say anything she likes it to.

Toys R Us still have the old advertising speil on their website claiming this version has the original phrases. I guess they are teaching children what disappointment is before they grow and experience it on a daily basis.

Despite the lack of voice the play set is great fun. It is set up as a seaside resort with arcade machines, fast food shacks, a roller coaster leading out into the surf. Obviously set on the coast of Amity Island where Jaws likes to chill out. He has got bored of humans and has turned his attention to chrome and carbon fiber.

The cars are pushed to the top of the roller coaster with a lift up mechanism before being launched down and through the jaws of....er.... Jaws?! Will the shark catch the car or will the car slip by with just a whiff of shark breath. Only the bravest downhill racer will find out.

A nice set that has kept my daughter ( Ok! me.) happy for hours. Very well built and sturdy so should last a long time. I just wish the ramp up to the top of the coaster was connected to the floor better. Despite the disappointment over the missing phrases this set is worthy to be in anyones collection.

The Evil Dead C64

Sam and Rob are the hitchhikers down the road!!!

The Evil Mutants is not as catchy a title

With the remake of the classic horror film the Evil Dead hitting the cinema I thought it was time to revisit the not so classic game from 1984 for the Commodore 64. The Evil Dead is one of the first true examples of a survival horror game. Following the storyline of the film Ash and 4 of his friends move into the infamous cabin in the woods. All is going well until the evil spirit in the woods is awakened and starts wrecking havoc on poor Ash. You control Ash as he tries to keep the evil spirit out of the cabin by closing the doors and windows that randomly open. The evil spirit is manifest as a yellow cloud that will chase Ash's friends. If it catches up to them then they are turned in to er... a mutant. I don't know if a Candarian demon was too scary for an 80's game but the instructions say they are mutants so that's that. If Ash is hit first by the evil spirit then a life is instantly lost which is sucky. It would have been cool to become a deadite (screw the instructions) and killed off the rest of the living.

The evil spirit about to posses an innocent

Once possessed your un-friends will turn their attention on you and mercilessly hunt you down. Luckily the cabin is well equipped for such a scenario. A sword, shovel, shotgun and axe are all at your disposal to send the undead fiends back to the fires of hell and you will need all the help you can get. At the bottom of the screen is your energy meter that plummets with every step taken. The enemies take a huge chunk when they attack. The only way to refill it is by cracking some heads. Kill a demon though and it's body parts will come after you. Once you have destroyed them too then that's one less deadite to worry about. After all 4 of Ash's friends have turned and been killed then the cabin resets and we start again.

The tools of demon destruction

Being such an old game the Evil Dead is as basic as it gets. The graphics are simple but get the idea across. The action is fast paced but it can be confusing as to whether you are successfully killing the demons before they damage you as there is no animations when attacking. It's seems to be pure luck as to whether I regain any health or not. The demons follow a very simple route to Ash and will get stuck on every bit of the scenery. Ash is also difficult to manoeuvre which leads to frustration when you can't get into a room because your shoulder is slightly touching a spade. The instructions state that once a certain score is reached then the book of the dead (the ancient text in the film that summons the demons) will appear for the player to throw into the fire and complete the game. I wouldn't know as no matter how long I play for it never appears.

Even body parts hate you.

The Evil Dead is ok for a few minutes but it is too confusing to actually get any enjoyment out of it. There doesn't seem to be any skill involved just random events that generally go bad for the player. To be fair though it would take until 2005's Evil Dead Regeneration before we could finally play a good game based on the films.

Erm......Groovy anyone?

Psycho Pigs UXB! C64

I love the smell of bacon in the morning!

Something insane is happening down at the farm. The pigs have all turned psychotic and rather than wait for their date with the abattoir they have decided to take fate into their own er trotters. When you just want to blow stuff up there is no better way than with Psycho Pigs UXB for the Commodore 64.

Survival of the fattest!

Originally released in the arcades as Mr. Pig, Psycho Pigs UXB is an arena combat game where the aim is to collect and throw bombs at your opponents while avoiding being hit yourself. There are two ways to die. Either a direct hit from a bomb or, once picked up, a number on the bomb will start to count down. When it reaches zero then boom and any pig in the blast radius is instant spare ribs. When you are last pig standing then it is on to the next round. The action is split every few rounds with a whack-a-mole style bonus round for extra points. Pigs pop out of holes on the screen and it's your job to run up and slap them back down. Aaaaah that feels good.

Whack-a-pig

The game is kept refreshing by special character pigs that are introduced at the beginning of each stage. Each character pig has special attributes. Either they are more aggressive, more strategic or faster. To even the score you can collect various power ups throughout the level. A bag to hold up to three bombs at a time, a bomb suit allowing you to survive one explosion, speed up drinks and smart bombs that clear the screen in a flash.

A pig on bomb disposal duty

The game controls are simple, fast and fluid. Run into a bomb and you automatically pick it up. Then aim your pig in the direction you want and press the fire button to launch. With all the pigs and bombs flying around the action gets frantic at times but it is great fun and for a game that shows all it has in the first few screens the game never gets repetitive all the way to the shock twist end screen. The graphics, while not that great to look at, do a fine job in making sure that things are not confusing and the music is nice. Although, like the gameplay, there is no real variety in either.

Psycho Pigs UXB is one of them hidden gems that not a lot of people have heard of but if you manage to give it a go you will find an exciting, action packed game. It's a blast!

Absolutely B-oinkers!!!

Mr. Domino PS1

Domino Rally!!!

There is nothing cooler than a giant domino run. With the cool design, lots of colours and special effects. All the tension as the dominoes topple into one another and a slight mistake could mean disaster for the whole run. Mr. Domino tries to capture that feeling of tension, excitement and surprise in a great looking game for the PlayStation.

The player directly control Mr. Domino as he runs continuous laps around a course set in various themed locations. The goal is to lay down a trail of dominoes and lead them to fall on set action triggers located at various points along the track. The next lap round Mr. Domino must bump into the first domino to start up the domino run. When set up perfectly the dominoes fall on the action triggers that set off mostly comedic scenes revolving around the courses theme. These will then hit the next set of dominoes and the run continues. If the domino run continues then bonus points are awarded for how many action triggers are set off in a chain. If one of the dominoes fail to fall then Mr. Domino will make another lap of the track to try again.

Of course it is not as simple as it sounds. The track is littered with all kinds of obstacles that will make Mr. Domino trip and stumble thus breaking the trail of dominoes  Even Mr. Domino's family seem to be out to stop him as they throw objects, electrocute and even use magic powers to stop the chain. This can get frustrating when a perfect run is ruined by missing one domino. A time limit is also on the player as Mr. Domino's stamina slowly runs out and if it reaches zero he will turn back in to a lifeless domino. There are collectibles on the track that will restore some stamina but they can only be used once so some strategy is needed. Some other track collectibles are a speed boost, a slow down and a restart button which will reset the track including any progress the player has made.

The graphics are very colourful and vibrant with the feel of a comic book. The level themes vary greatly and each of the actions triggered on the courses are very entertaining (and insane) giving the player a great reason to keep on playing to the end.With only 6 stages the game can be completed quickly but after completing the game the other members of the Domino clan become playable with each having their own characteristics posing new challenges for the player. Mr. Domino controls very well with the D-pad controlling movement left and right between tracks and up and down controlling |Mr. Domino's speed. Only one button is used to drop the dominoes making the game very simple and great for younger players.

Overall this is a simple, quirky little game that can be frustrating at times but very satisfying when everything goes right for the player and of course there is no mess to pick up after the fun is over.

Highly Insane!!!

Aquanauts Holiday PS1

Under the sea!!!

When life begins to get on top of you it's time to take a little break and get away from it all. And where better to go than to the bottom of the ocean. Aquanauts Holiday for the Playstation is less a game and more of a stress reliever. The player controls a submarine as you explore the vast ocean looking for interesting artefacts and structures. Along the way you will find a wide range of sea life. fish, whales, turtles, sharks and other sea life.

You can communicate with the marine life through the use of sounds triggered by the Playstation controllers L and R buttons. Depending on which tones you play the animals will react in different ways. From hypnotic states to dancing to fleeing if you play the wrong tones.

One of the goals of the game is to create a giant coral reef near to your homebase that will attract a large number of marine life. This is built in a 3D editor which uses resources collected from the fish (i.e fish poop) when you have found the correct tones to use on each variety of fish. Once your reef is at a big enough size and the fish arrive you can sit back and admire while all your daily stress slips away.

This is a strange game but is very hypnotic to play. The submarine can be a bit of a pain to control at times and it's frustrating trying to find out what tones work best with each fish. But with patience it is a rewarding game with plenty to see and do.

Exterminator C64

When you need more than a can of Raid!

Oh dear! It looks like the houses in the neighbourhood are experiencing a little bug problem. So who are you going to call? In this case they called a giant pair of floating hands to smash, crush and shoot away all the nasties. I guess this is what you call a hand job. Exterminator is a port of the 1989 arcade machine by Gottlieb.

The player controls one of the floating hands in a third person perspective looking from one end of a room to another. Various types of insects and other small pests move toward the player. The pests can be catagorised as flying or ground type. The flying insects include moths, wasps and hornets. The moths are harmless and simply need to be crushed. Trying to crush the wasps however will result in damage from the stinger so best to shake them off with a waggle of the joystick. Hornets are very aggressive and will constantly attack the player making well timed crushing vital. The ground enemies can all be squished on the floor. Spiders are again harmless but there are frogs that will use there tongue to eat you and even remote controlled tanks with real firing bullets! When you see cans, tomatos and toy tanks coming to life and attacking I think it's time to call in an exorcist instead.

The aim of the game is to kill a pest strategically over a grid of black and white squares on the floor. As a insect hits the floor a white tile will slide from the back of the grid forward toward the screen. Once a row has been turned completely white the room is clear and it's time to go to the next level. There are 6 houses with the levels being different rooms in the house. Clear all the rooms and you travel to the next house to start again. A bonus level seperates each house where the player can earn extra points and a slight energy refill.

The graphics are nice and colourful retaining the look of the digitised arcade original. The sprites are huge and very detailed. The backgrounds are static, prerenders. Again with lots of detail to keep the eyes busy.

I love the music in this game and can still hum the theme tune all these years later. The levels have some great tunes too. The SID chip rendition of the Flight of the Bumblebee is fantastic and a nice A-team theme tune sound-a-like will keep your head nodding.
Overall this a great game. A very simple premise that is executed in a fast, exciting way. It's a tough challenge and not many exterminators will see it through to the end but it's an amazing ride.